Last Friday I was cleaning my liquor cabinet when I noticed half-bottles gathering dust. Figured I should finally test those “strong shot beverages” everyone talks about. Grabbed a notebook and my phone timer – let’s see what actually works.
The Setup & Rules
Chose five random bottles already open: cheap espresso vodka, some tequila, rum, that nasty cinnamon whiskey from last Christmas, and basic bourbon. Rules were simple: one shot per drink, no mixers, timer starts at first sip. Buzz level rated 1-10 (10 being wasted).
Execution Phase
Tried the espresso vodka first. Poured a shot glass full, gulped it fast. Instant regret. Tasted like burnt coffee grounds soaked in rubbing alcohol. Felt a jittery head rush after 8 minutes? Like bad coffee with a side of regret. Buzz: 4/10. Just anxious, not fun.
Next up: tequila. Did the whole salt-lemon thing outta habit. Shuddered through it. That weird metallic aftertaste lingered. By minute 15, felt warm but super tired. Buzz: 3/10. Basically a sleeping pill.
Rum was third. Smelled like vanilla cake… lied big time. Burned all the way down. Waited 20 minutes pacing my kitchen. Got chatty with my cat but zero energy boost. Buzz: 5/10. Mildly happy but sluggish.
Cinnamon whiskey nightmare. Took half the shot and almost choked. Like drinking Red Hots dipped in gas. Tiny sip took 3 tries to finish. Flush face at minute 10, headache by 25. Buzz: 2/10. Pure punishment.
Final round: bourbon. Actually okay? Sipped slow (learned my lesson). Smoky but not awful. 30 minutes in, relaxed but still sharp. Finished my laundry without stumbling. Buzz: 6/10. Smooth operator.
Ugly Takeaways
- Espresso vodka: Coffee and booze just fight in your mouth.
- Tequila: Only good for bad decisions at parties.
- Rum: Sneaky sleepiness. Dangerously comfy couch vibes.
- Cinnamon whiskey: Satan’s cough syrup. Avoid.
- Bourbon: Slow burn pays off. Won’t wreck your evening.
Left my notebook on the counter covered in splashes. Woke up to “tequila makes u sleepy??” scribbled sideways. That experiment wasted 2 hours and proved most “strong shots” are garbage hype. Cheap bourbon actually wins? Did NOT see that coming. Next time just mixing Coke with rum like a normal person.
